The last time this happened, I lost a summer. The longest was nine months or so. At least I have a word for it now. Before my diagnosis, I thought of it as me being “weak/useless/wrecking everything” (ha, I still think that a lot of the time; acceptance is a journey..!) and then, when I […]

Counting down to the Asia Pacific Autism Conference🌱 I’m juggling the last deadlines and projects before we leave. The mission now? Memorise my speech, and forget everything else – forget that the 1800 strong conference is sold out, forget that just attending a conference of this size and level of awesomeness is going to be […]

22 April is Jellybean Day. Any excuse to talk candy! A friend sent me an article about a late-diagnosed Autistic, and this part jumped out at me: “Emma’s childhood was marked by odd behaviours that concerned her mother, but were dismissed by the family doctor as “quirkiness”. If she had a packet of lollies, she felt […]

It’s kind of silly because we’re Autistic every month, but kind of awesome because it puts a (red or gold) light on – even just for 30 days. Here’s my tip: you can’t tell who’s who by looking. Autism isn’t always male. It isn’t always non-verbal. It isn’t always flapping, mimicking, pacing, melt-down-shut-down, touch-avoiding, head-phone-wearing, […]

Alarms are going off. Maybe someone says something and you brush it off. At first. Maybe you see a character that resonates, read a book that clicks. Maybe it’s someone else’s diagnosis. A friend. A family member. Your child. So, you search the Internet, and your head gets quiet: what if I’m autistic? You keep […]

Have you seen it? In the shops, in the streets, on the screens? Everything is so. Bloody. Shiny. Don’t get me wrong – it’s beautiful. Mesmerising. Twinkling. But exhausting. I’ve been out more than usual the last month or so and it’s obvious. As demonstrated by my shaky filter; thoughts spilling out onto tables and […]

The autistic female. If she makes eye contact, connects socially, and -shock horror- smiles; how do you spot her? When I was diagnosed, I started reading everything. Stories, studies, stats. The word ‘autism’ made me flinch, I had very little understanding of what it meant – and even less of what it would mean for me as a […]

How are you? Really? I’m currently a million things and I’ve now got less than two seconds to decipher which one you want. This on top of knowing that I can only tell the truth, and I need to protect your feelings, our relationship, and try and avoid getting the look. When I worked in an […]

Here’s the thing about being sick, shutdown, out of action, or otherwise forcibly paused; it sets you on fire. On fire to be, do, or have anything. Who knows how long you’ve got until the next time? So, you have to be twice as on when you’re on, because who knows when or how long you’ll […]